A Birth Story.

And so I was born. I entered the world screaming and flailing, as we all do. I knew it was destined to be a tumultuous ride. However, the womb no longer offered security and safety, it had become cramped. And, in true Kerrie nature, I was ready for something new. A chance to grow, explore, and create a story with meaning. Even in the womb my work was made clear to me. Yes, it was ‘safe’ from external forces, yet the instability and fluctuations in my carrier rippled through my unborn being. Before the journey even began I was riddled with a sense of unease, like nothing would ever be a natural state of stillness. This would be a part of my life’s work.

Upon arrival I was taken to be cleaned and wrapped and then placed in the arms of the warrior who dared to bring new life into a world that she herself found scary, unsettling, and rattled with fear and anxieties. I was comforted by embrace, but also well aware that something was missing; a sense of attunement and attachment. When I was taken home I met my sister who was already living a life created by adversity and challenge. But boy did she love me. A new play thing was the perfect distraction from the reality of her world, and also something to love. Love was a tricky commodity in her home.

Then there was dad. He was pleased with the  addition and hopeful that it would evoke a long awaited change in a world he too was struggling to find peace and love in. I was to be a beacon of hope. A ray of light to move away from the dark, terrifying places my sister and dad watched unfold through an ever increasing instability of the matriarchy. I think that’s an awful lot of pressure on one new born girl, to usher in salvation simply by being born. But, reflecting on the condition of my entry into the world, it seems to be symbolic, a metaphor for the course of my human life.

How could I become that beacon? Someone who offers love, support, joy, and safety to myself, but also others. It was the gift bestowed to me, the opportunity to evolve into a person with infinite love and potential. Born to heal someone else and slowly, slowly, fulfilling that role by finding the light within that could shine so brightly it would help others believe they too can shine. Another human life brought into the world with the incredible opportunity to connect, to remember the oneness we all derive from, to help walk each other home.*  And so, what a glorious birth it was.

Un-regrettably born,

Kerrie

* “We’re all just walking each other home"“ - Ram Daas